Memories of Anne - My Second Mummy, Fairy Godmother, and the Best Friend a Girl Could Have…

On the evening of September 3, I was heading to meet my friend, Julie, for a coffee catch up when my cousin, Steven, called with the news that my Aunt Anne had been rushed to A&E. She had been convalescing in hospital for a number of months, but this was a serious turn of events… things did not look good.

No sooner had our coffee been served than another call came in. It wouldn’t be long… Apologising, I kissed Julie on the cheek and ran to my car. 10 minutes later I was at the hospital, but Anne had already slipped away… I held her hand and said my goodbyes then helped Steven pack up her effects and we left with tearful “thank yous” to the nurses who had cared for her.

Death is the strangest thing - there is a horror in its finality and in the desperate denial we feel at first. Then follows the vast emptiness of the loss that engulfs our every thought, feeling, moment. Sometimes you all but forget, then you feel guilty, because… how could you forget? The only way to move on is to remember, and so, here is Anne, remembered.

Anne had the most kind, thoughtful nature. She was forever asking how other people were doing; forever empathetic with their respective situations. She could tell you the names of all the people who worked in the shops, restaurants and cafes she frequented. And it didn’t stop there… she would remember their kids’ names, their health issues, the jobs they did and their grandkids if they had them!

When she became ill, and wasn’t getting out much, everyone in Milngavie, from the baristas making her take out cappuccino, to the pharmacist and the assistants in M&S, would all stop me to ask how she was.

This was indicative of how well she was liked and just how easily she made friends. Although family was always Anne’s first priority, she had an undeniable ability to connect with everyone. Perhaps because she showed a genuine interest in them, because she shared in their joys and sorrows, everyone responded to her warmth and selflessness. 

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As a child, I remember Anne as my glamorous aunt who was always beautifully adorned in layers and layers of gold necklaces and bracelets - you would hear them jangling before you would see her! She whizzed around, always quick on her feet, leaving clouds of perfume behind her… I’m sure, to this day, my love of bold, statement jewellery is inspired by those early memories. The red ruffled dress I’m wearing in this post is one of Anne’s original evening gowns from the 70’s. She gave it to me about 15 years ago, and I proudly wore it to an O2 event in Cannes. It was perfect for the glamorous South of France, where we dined al fresco, at sunset, and stayed at the Hotel Martinez on the Croixette. Memories to cherish.

At birthday parties, Anne would stop by and, if you were labouring over that second hamburger, she would swoop in, with a handful of paper hankies, and snatch the offending food off your plate for you! All the better to get on to the cake and the jelly and ice cream!

From the time I was 3, we holidayed as an extended family on Menorca. Those were the halcyon days of family, fun in the sun and nighttime walks to Las Dunas. It used to annoy me when Anne would ask, after I stifled a yawn: “Are you tired, pet?” And I would lie and say “no, not at all…” It was only because I was having so much fun, and didn’t want another day there with everyone to end.

It was Anne who first encouraged my singing career! I couldn’t have been more than 4 or 5 when she got me up in front of the whole banqueting hall at a hotel in Aviemore to sing “Save All Your Kisses for Me”! I think I cried… I’ve got better on stage since! But she never missed a birthday request on Radio Clyde - “Rockin All Over the World” was my personal favourite - I was 4!

Forever Friend

Anne was an incredibly good listener. She and I spent endless Saturday afternoons drinking coffee and putting the world to rights. She patiently listened to my every drama! We often chatted over problems on the phone for hours too. She always issued advice, but never judgement, in my best interests. I’m sure I’ll miss those calls and coffees most of all…

For several years we had a standing Sunday night dinner date at Paperino’s. These were often the highlight of my weekend. Sometimes there’d be 3, 4 or 5 of us, but there would invariably be Anne and I, ordering penne à la crema and a glass of wine!

After moving to Milngavie, Anne enjoyed working part-time at Homebase. She took great pride in a job well done; she counselled the teens who worked there, and consoled the golden oldies who shopped there. She embodied ‘service with a smile’ and sold more gold cards than they’d ever seen! If she’d stayed there any longer she’d have been running the place!

Planning my wedding without my mum was the really difficult thing about that joyous time. But I had the next best thing in my mum’s sister, Anne, my Fairy Godmother! She tirelessly came to every appointment - one florist kept us talking for 45 minutes before she ever mentioned flowers! She was there to meet Morag, our photographer, for every wedding dress appointment, and then every single fitting, after I’d found The Dress. Every detail was discussed, approved and supported by Anne.

I’ve already alluded to Anne’s glamour and style - we even bought the same blouse on one shopping trip! She was probably my first Personal Styling client (although I didn’t know it then)! She loved to find a new jacket, necklace or scarf to stay on trend. And, my goodness did she love her high heels!

Anne kept pace with technology too, joining first Facebook, then WhatsApp and Instagram (where she tirelessly liked and commented on my every post). Adopting her smartphone, tablet and home WiFi were not imposed on her, she was determined to get connected and stay in touch with people’s lives and stories. 

Biggest Fan!

My biggest fan and supporter, Anne genuinely believed in me and would tell me I could do anything I put my mind to. After changing careers a couple of years ago, her support sustained me through my many moments of doubt. Her positive encouragement is what I will hold on to, what I’ll continue to work hard for. She recently said to me “You’ll get there, keep going”! And so, I must…

Super Mum!

Anne had many roles in life, but there was none she was more proud of, or got more joy from than being Steven’s mum. She thought the world of him. They were close in a way that was enviable to observe, sharing all of life’s ups and downs and, of course, the in-jokes and funnies that tickled them both! Towards the end, that strong bond was more evident than ever in the way Anne relied on Steven’s support and in the tireless devotion he showed towards her. 

She will be terribly missed by all of us…

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